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Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Cambodian Zombie Army?

Posted by: Hammer / 7:46 AM

From the BBC:
There has been a small outbreak of "zombism" in a small town near the border of Laos in North-Eastern Cambodia.

The culprit was discovered to be mosquitoes native to that region carrying a new strain of Malaria which thus far has a 100 percent mortality rate and kills victims in fewer than 2 days.

After death, this parasite is able to restart the heart of its victim for up to two hours after the initial demise of the person where the individual behaves in extremely violent ways from what is believed to be a combination of brain damage and a chemical released into blood during "resurrection."

...General Ary Serey had this to say, "We have obtained samples of this new parasite and plan to learn how it starts the heart and other major organs of the deceased. We intend to use this to increase the quality of life for all."

US Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice opposed the plan saying that the Cambodian government holds a great biological weapon and should destroy it immediately. Cambodian officials have yet to comment.

Nice to see Rice take the "fire, bad!" approach to international relations. I don't know what the quality of medical research facilities in Cambodia is, but I'm pretty sure there aren't any researchers who would handle the parasite unless they thought conditions were safe. No one wants to be turned into a zombie.

Unless, of course, you got to be chased down by Sarah Michelle Gellar.

9 Comments:

Ummm, note the date on that story.

http://www.snopes.com/humor/iftrue/zombies.asp

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:39 AM  

They fooled me, Jerry!

That's what I get for not looking at the URL:

fake story:
http://65.127.124.62/south_asia/4483241.stm.htm

real BBC:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/default.stm

By Blogger Hammer, at 11:51 AM  

Sorry men, but I found this link http://65.127.124.62/south_asia/4483241.stm.htm By navigateing the real BBC news page.


This story is real, but there are some as* ho*** that changed the pic of the helicopters with the pic of a """Zombie"""

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:03 PM  

i'm zyfree an i had dreams about zombies an there's gonna be more

By Anonymous zyfree, at 12:11 AM  

It is not a real story. Anonymous, please tell me how you navigated to find it. I searched the real BBC site for "Quan'sul", "malaria", "zombie malaria" and I got back nothing.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:47 PM  

dude the story is totally real i did extensive research and its the real thing there was a zombism outbreak in kambodia

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:59 PM  

it was not a joke it was only on there page for about 5 to 10 mins before it was taken down and a few ppl saved the page. no one ever hear of cover up

By Blogger Doomtrigger, at 12:24 AM  

They were hacked momentarily. If you believe this you are retarded and play way too many video games.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:08 PM  

http://web.archive.org/web/20050428004220/http://65.127.124.62/south_asia/4483241.stm.htm

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:08 PM  

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